Most parsimonious game ever?

Pop Quiz:

Q: What is the fewest possible number of plate appearances by one team in an official game?

A: 27? No wait...15? No..

Would you believe...13?


Whilst poking around on bbrefpi, I encountered the following gem: Box

Dick Drago held the Orioles perfect for four innings, except for a Frank Robinson dinger. By the time it started raining in the middle of the 5th, the O's were winning, the game (featuring five future Hall of Famers, by my count) was official, and Drago went down in history for the fewest batters faced in a complete game - an unbreakable record!

Captain Zero's Zeroes

Ever wonder what a roster would look like, comprised entirely of the worst players to have ever suited up? Wonder no longer.

STARTING LINEUP	Pos	Year	Team	HR	RBI	SB	BA	OBP	SLG	OPS+
Brad Ausmus	C	2006	HOU	2	39	3	.230	.308	.285	54
Ivy Griffin	1B	1920	PHA	0	20	3	.238	.281	.274	47
Bill Hallman	2B	1901	CLE-PHI	0	41	13	.185	.238	.235	36
Art Scharein	3B	1933	SLB	0	26	7	.204	.269	.244	34
Jim Levey	SS	1933	SLB	2	36	4	.195	.237	.240	24
Brian Hunter	LF	1999	DET-SEA	4	34	44	.232	.280	.301	48
Willy Taveras	CF	2008	COL	1	26	68	.251	.308	.296	56
Earl McNeely	RF	1928	SLB	0	44	8	.236	.299	.319	60
Skeeter Newsome	DH	1936	PHA	0	46	13	.225	.266	.265	33
"Bench"	Pos	Year	Team	HR	RBI	SB	BA	OBP	SLG	OPS+
Jim Sundberg	C	1975	TEX	6	36	3	.199	.283	.256	55
Billy Hunter	2S	1953	SLB	1	37	3	.219	.253	.259	37
Hunter Hill	13	1904	SLB-WSH	0	31	14	.204	.236	.226	49
George Barclay	OF	1904	STL-BSN	1	38	17	.205	.241	.254	55
Michael Bourn	OF	2008	HOU	5	29	41	.229	.288	.300	57
Average (Min 502 PA)				2	35	17	.218	.271	.268	46.1
ROTATION	Pos	Year	Team	W	L	IP	K	WHIP	ERA	ERA+
Jose Lima	SP	2005	KCR	5	16	169	80	1.66	6.99	63
Dan Griner	SP	1913	STL	10	22	225	79	1.53	5.08	64
Irv Young	SP	1907	BSN	10	23	245	86	1.41	3.96	64
Hal Gregg	SP	1944	BRO	9	16	198	92	1.71	5.46	65
Eric Milton	SP	2005	CIN	8	15	186	123	1.55	6.47	66
Average (Min. 30 GS)				8	18	205	92	1.57	5.59	64.4
BULLPEN	Pos	Year	Team	W	L	SV	K/9	WHIP	ERA	ERA+
Vic Darensbourg	LG	1999	FLA	0	1	0	4.15	2.05	8.83	49
Ron Davis	SU	1986	MIN-CHC	2	8	2	6.14	2.01	8.59	49
Lee Guetterman	SU	1992	NYY-NYM	4	5	2	2.73	1.80	7.09	51
Jose Mesa	CL	2003	PHI	5	7	24	6.98	1.76	6.52	61
Derrick Turnbow	CL	2006	MIL	4	9	24	11.02	1.69	6.87	66
Mike Williams	CL	2003	PIT-PHI	1	7	28	5.57	1.70	6.14	69
Average (Min. 50 GR)				3	6.2	13	6.1	1.84	7.34	57.5

You'll probably notice a few things about this team:

• first of all, several of these players were traded mid-season (no surprise), but also that it includes the left side of the infield for the 1933 St. Louis Browns. You'd think that with those clunkers draining valuable VORP for 500+ PAs, the Browns wouldn't be such a good team, but they actually won the pennant that year! Just kidding, they finished dead last.
• Also interesting is the fact that Jose Mesa appears both on this list, AND on the list of top 3 closers' ERA+ seasons!
• Speedsters Willy Taveras, Brian Hunter and Michael Bourn all spent the bulks of their careers with the Astros.
  

Cleveland Indians All-Time All Star Team

I had so much fun compiling that all-time all-star team, I thought I'd do it for just the Indians. I figured I'd use similar rules, except compile a 25-man roster: 8 position players plus a DH (best season by a player not already listed, rather than the best season by a DH), with a minimum of 502 PA. The bench is comprised of a backup catcher, a backup 2B/SS and a backup 1B/3B, and two extra outfielders (again, no duplicate seasons allowed, so each is for the next best unique player).

For pitchers, it was a bit trickier and perhaps a bit arbitrary. To make the rotation, a pitcher simply needed a minimum of 30 games started. I did this instead of making a minimum 162 IP because a lot of old-timey pitchers were coming up who only started 10-15 games and relieved another 2-30, yet pitched enough innings to qualify for the ERA title. I simply did not want those guys on my All-Star team, because I assume there was a reason they didn't spend the entire season in the rotation, and alsdo because I think their numbers look ugly.

In the pen, I wanted three closers, two setup guys and a situational lefty.

1) A closer was simply defined as someone who a) relieved at least 50 games, and b) had at least 20 saves.

2) A setup guy was defined as someone who a) relieved at least 50 games, b) saved 19 or fewer games, and c) was not:

3) A situational lefty, which I (rather arbitrarily) defined as someone who a) relieved at least 50 games, b) threw with his left hand, and c) had at least 10 fewer innings pitched than appearances.

Without further ado...

STARTING LINEUP	Pos	Year	Team	HR	RBI	SB	BA	OBP	SLG	OPS+
Johnny Romano	C	1961	CLE	21	80	0	.299	.377	.483	132
Jim Thome	1B	2002	CLE	52	118	1	.304	.445	.677	197
Nap LaJoie	2B	1904	CLE	6	102	29	.376	.413	.552	205
Al Rosen	3B	1953	CLE	43	145	8	.336	.442	.613	179
Lou Boudreau	SS	1948	CLE	18	106	3	.355	.453	.534	164
Albert Belle	LF	1995	CLE	50	126	5	.317	.401	.690	177
Tris Speaker	CF	1916	CLE	2	79	35	.386	.470	.502	185
Shoeless Joe Jackson	RF	1911	CLE	7	83	41	.408	.468	.590	193
Manny Ramirez	DH	2000	CLE	38	122	1	.351	.457	.697	186
Bench	Pos	Year	Team	HR	RBI	SB	BA	OBP	SLG	OPS+
Victor Martinez	C	2005	CLE	20	80	0	.305	.378	.475	130
Roberto Alomar	2S	2001	CLE	20	100	30	.336	.415	.541	150
Boog Powell	13	1975	CLE	27	86	1	.297	.377	.524	154
Rocky Colavito	OF	1958	CLE	41	113	0	.303	.405	.620	180
Elmer Flick	OF	1905	CLE	4	64	35	.308	.383	.462	166
Average (Min 502 PA)				25	100	14	.334	.420	.569	171
ROTATION	Pos	Year	Team	W	L	IP	K	WHIP	ERA	ERA+
Addie Joss	SP	1908	CLE	24	11	325	130	0.81	1.16	205
Luis Tiant	SP	1968	CLE	21	9	258	264	0.87	1.6	186
Cliff Lee	SP	2008	CLE	22	3	223	170	1.11	2.54	175
Gaylord Perry	SP	1972	CLE	24	16	343	234	0.98	1.92	170
Herb Score	SP	1956	CLE	20	9	249	263	1.17	2.53	166
Average				22	10	280	212	0.99	1.95	180
Average (Min. 30 GS)
BULLPEN	Pos	Year	Team	W	L	SV	K/9	WHIP	ERA	ERA+
Paul Assenmacher	LG	1996	CLE	4	2	1	8.49	1.29	3.09	159
Rafael Betancourt	SU	2007	CLE	5	1	3	9.08	0.76	1.47	312
Steve Mingori	SU	1971	CLE	1	2	4	7.15	0.97	1.43	267
Jose Mesa	CL	1995	CLE	3	0	46	8.16	1.03	1.12	415
Mike Jackson	CL	1998	CLE	1	1	40	7.73	0.88	1.55	307
Bob Wickman	CL	2001	CLE	5	0	32	8.78	1.11	2.39	187
Average (Min. 50 GR)				3	1	21	8.23	1.01	1.84	275